Tuesday, April 30, 2013

This Week will be a Challenge, Part II

I had started a different post where I was going to speak about trying to follow the Whole30 approach starting May 1st.    That plan is being postponed and tomorrow I am heading over the mountain again to spend some time with mom.  She’s doing fine, I just want to spend some time with her and help with a few things.  I hadn’t planned on going during the middle of the week, but my manager encouraged me to just go.  He is fine with me taking time off or bringing my laptop and working from mom’s house again.  I plan to do both.  I’m starting to like this manager more and more.

I’m not sure if I’ll be gone just a few days or over a week.  I do know that eating will be a challenge.  My mom likes to feed her guests.  Since it will be just her and I, I think I will be able to convince her not to cook as much and to cut back on the carbs.  Still, I will need to be extra strong and aware of what I am putting in my mouth.  My husband told me to just eat less crap and sent the following that he found on Facebook today.   Man, I’m going to miss him.

Again, I want to thank you all for the warm wishes and comments regarding my step-father.  They touched me more than I can adequately express.

Hope you have a great Wednesday.  I’ll be in a car for six hours and hoping that Snoqualmie Pass doesn’t have snow on the road.  Talk to you from the other side.

Sunday, April 28, 2013

He's Gone

After visiting with my step-father and giving my mom a much needed hand, I drove home last Sunday.  I wasn’t sure if I would see my step-father again or not.  He was very weak, but I had seen this from him two other times over the last six years or so.  Neither time was related to his lung cancer. 

The first time he had Guillain-Barre Syndrome.  Ever heard of it?  I hadn’t, but now it sticks out like a sore thumb each year when I sign the release form for my flu shot, as there is a potential risk of developing it.  I’m not sure how he caught it (he didn't have the flu shot), but basically he was paralyzed from neck to toe for a while.  Even his lungs were affected and he had to be put on a respirator to breathe.  He overcame it, but from then on had to be hooked up to oxygen and had some permanent nerve damage in his legs and feet.  

A few years ago, and I am not sure how this all came about, but his bowels were not working.  He was in the hospital for several months with his intestines on the outside of his body (sorry).  There were several times during that hospital stay that we thought he wouldn’t make it to live another day.  But he always did.  He was a tough man with a strong will to live (probably the Marine in him).

Lung cancer finally took his life.  I’m glad that I was able to visit him one last time (mom lives 350 miles away).  I’ve known him for about twenty years and he was married to mom for almost sixteen.  He was an alcoholic and many thought him to be a grumpy old man.  Personally, I think he was just honest and if he didn’t care for you much, he let you know by how he treated you.  He always liked my husband and me and was always kind to us.  

Mom will miss him, but I think she is glad to have it over.  I don’t mean that harshly, but the last few years have taken a toll on her health as she put off taking care of some things because she needed to be around to take care of him.  Even though he had tons and tons of friends, there won’t be a service.  Instead he wanted a gathering at a local bar with him footing the bill one last time.  May he rest in peace.

This weekend hasn’t been the best food wise, but I did do some cooking.  Also, I have the house stocked up and some meals and vegetables prepped for the week.  I plan to start following the Whole30 approach, maybe easing into it the next couple of days.  I was more active this weekend than I have been in the recent past, although today has been mostly restful.  It’s definitely a move in the right direction, now I need to keep stepping it up.

How was your weekend?  Was it mostly active or restful?  What healthy plans do you have for this week?

Friday, April 26, 2013

My Excuses = Laziness

It used to upset me when I would hear that fat people are lazy.  It is a stereotype that doesn’t apply to all overweight people.  It really used to bother me until I realized that in my case it is the absolute truth.

I am morbidly obese because I have plenty of excuses for not eating healthy or exercising.

Reason I don’t cook (healthy meals or otherwise):
It takes too long
I don’t have a plan   
I would need to clean the pans first
I would have to prep vegetables
I would have to stand
I could play on the computer instead
I could watch television instead
I would have to do dishes afterwards

Reasons I don’t exercise:
My back hurts when I stand > five minutes
My shoulders hurt when I walk
I might get muscle cramps
I have to put my tennis shoes on
I could play on the computer instead
I could watch television instead
I am afraid to be in public

These excuses are all pathetic, believe me I know.  Whine much?  Also, they all boil down to one main excuse…I’m L-A-Z-Y  LAZY! This is the same excuse for why my house is not tidy and organized.   Okay, unorganized is an understatement.  A few rooms (my office, a spare bedroom and garage) appear as if I am a downright hoarder.   Hmmm, me thinks the stereotype fits me well.
I have eaten out for the last five nights and I haven’t taken advantage of the sunny weather by walking.  Well, I’m tired of eating garbage and feeling like a slug.  I’m tired of losing a couple of pounds and then watching the scale creep back up.  I’m tired of it all.

I know what the problem is and I know I don’t like it, but how do I fix it?  The solution is simply just doing more.  Making an effort and then another and then another.  But I have to start.   Can I do this?  Of course I can.  Will I do this?  My inner dialogue is the first to answer with ‘I doubt it’.  It’s all talk until I take action. 

If I have disgusted you with my laziness and whining, I apologize.  It’s the last time.  Please stop by again.  Plan or no plan, I am drawing a line in the sand today.  No more laziness.   I will no longer accept it as an excuse.  Today, I will eat better (cooking is mandatory), I will exercise and I will do some cleaning.  That’s it; this is the last post where I only talk about what I am going to do.  From here on out, I will be talking about what I have done or am doing.  Action, action, action!  If I start whining again, please somebody punch me in the face.